Nathan and I are having a nice time in Barbados! Just wanted to say hello and Happy Halloween! We'll post pictures of the wedding and the honeymoon when we get back. Thank you to everyone who helped make the wedding so wonderful!
-Around the kitchen table with Nathan's extended family, we were discussing having the song "In the Bulb There is a Flower" sung at the wedding. This is one of Nathan's favorite songs, but it is in the death and dying section of the hymnal. Nathan said, "What do you think people will think about when they hear that song?" His aunt replied, "Are you afraid people will think you're pregnant?"
-"Don't worry about it (wedding planning). These things virtually plan themselves!" -Cass
-"I fell in love with Nathan long before Marika did!" -Bonnie (to introduce herself to the crowd at the shower)
-"Aunt Marika, you're going to get married and I'm going to wear a fancy suit!" -Zach
-I asked Zach if he could carry two rings down the isle at the wedding and his response was "I think I can because I have two fingers AND two hands!"
-"Am I going to marry you?" -Zach (confused about his role in the wedding)
-I walked to my desk and there was a children's book called "Hello, Baby!" on it. It was all about the process a woman goes through when having a baby. I asked my students who it belonged to and one said she was giving it to me. Another student responded by saying, "You know, probably to have for your marriage!"
-"I hear that you have three sisters and Nathan has one. It seems that you might be short on bridesmaids so if you need me to step in, just let me know!" -Irene (an older lady from church)
-"Is it true that Ms. Nolt's boyfriend proposed to her? That's too bad. I was hoping to have the opportunity to do that myself." -fourth grader (to a teacher)
-"She's a fourth grade teacher? That is THE BEST! She'll have a lot of patience, but she won't put up with your ----!" -Ian
-"You said yes to HIM?" -high schooler from church
-"Duh, that's why she's marrying him!" -4th grader (in response to the question "Is he cute?")
-"You can register for ANYTHING YOU WANT!" -Emily (with wide eyes!)
Tomorrow's the big day! :)
We have been busy, busy, busy! Yesterday we finally finished with the two biggest projects that I had been putting off- the centerpieces and the programs. Thanks to the help of my mom, grandma, Kate, and Dede, everything wrapped up at about 5:30 last night. Poor Dede... after waking up in NJ at 2:00 am yesterday morning to catch their 6:00 flight out of Philadelphia (with her husband and six month old), she willingly spent the whole day yesterday cutting paper and tying raffia. Her husband so kindly spent a long afternoon fixing my computer (which had a virus). My mom and grandmother completely took over the job of preparing the centerpieces (and they are going to look great!) Then, last night, a bunch of us went to get our nails done.
Nathan spent last evening at his bachelor party. A few weeks ago, at a school meeting, I overheard a guy talking about these new shirts that he had seen for grooms. They have a picture of a bride and a groom on the front- the groom with a frown and the bride with a big smile (of course) and underneath the picture are the words GAME OVER. I thought the shirt sounded pretty funny and wanted to get one for Nathan for his bachelor party but couldn't find one. Last night I got an e-mail from Nathan's cell phone with a picture of him wearing the shirt. Somebody at his bachelor party must have gotten him one (or had one for him to wear)! Pretty funny.
There are a few things still up in the air... we have three hours worth of music for the reception but we need four, we are hoping and praying that UPS delivers Dede's sash by 2:00 this afternoon like David's Bridal has promised, somehow I need to wrap my nephew Zach's present without him seeing (he's staying with me and the wrapping paper is in the guest room where he is sleeping this morning), and I need to make coffee this morning for my grandmother and me but we only have whole bean coffee and I don't know how to use the grinder (I could probably learn, but not this morning!)
I can't wait to see everybody tomorrow!
Nathan and I went to pick up our marriage license yesterday. It was so easy. Here we are outside the building with the license in our hand (but you can't see that in the pictures).
This week is set aside for wedding planning and friends and family. It is getting exciting to think about everybody who is flying or driving in to Colorado Springs during the next couple of days.
I am feeling better about the planning than I have in a while (and, who knows, maybe that's just because I'm oblivious to reality). The bubbles have ribbon on them, the rehearsal dinner and kuddie activity books are in good hands, my dress is almost finished, the bridesmaid's presents are wrapped, the CD's are burned, and I've even started packing for the honeymoon (just a little!). The only BIG details that need finalizing are the centerpieces, the programs, and the slide show. Of course, these are each time consuming projects but I think we are doing okay. (If any of you out there know better and realize the danger of my naivety- please inform me!) That's not to say that I won't be running around like a chicken with her head cut off for the next 6 days, but I'm feeling good.
I'm also feeling sad. I know I will always have memories and pictures to look back on but this day is going to come and go quickly. There will never be a time in my life again where I will be planning my wedding. I won't have a reason to buy a wedding magazine or to be looking in the wedding aisles at stores like Hobby Lobby and Target. I won't have a reason to put together a slide show of pictures of Nathan and me growing up or to make a CD of songs that are important to us to pass out to friends and family. I will never get to wear my dress again. Most importantly though, we will never again have our most important friends and family all in one place at one time. It's sad that this will be over all too soon. I will try hard to appreciate the joy of this next week as it unfolds.
no more books....no more teacher's dirty looks!
It's Sunday afternoon and I am VERY happy not to be going to school tomorrow! People often talk about the "Sunday evening blues"- that feeling of dread because you have to go to work again tomorrow. While I have always hated to see the weekend end, since I have been in Colorado Springs I have rarely felt sick/dread about returning to work on a Monday. Sometimes I needed more time to get ready for work on Monday, but I didn't hate going. Until this year. This year, I do have that feeling of REALLY not wanting to go back to work after being home for a weekend. That feeling helps me to understand better those people who just can't find the job that they love enough to be okay about going in to work.
I overheard a funny conversation in Hobby Lobby today-
Trey (approximately 6 years old) says to his younger sister, Hope: "Look! A pinata! Hope, wouldn't it be funny if we had a pinata that looked like mom, and we just kept smacking at it?"
Mom (sarcastically): "Well, that's really nice."
Trey (not getting the response he wanted from his little sister): "Hope, wouldn't it be funny if there was a pinata shaped like mom that we could keep smacking!?"
Mom (annoyed): "Trey, that is NOT appropriate!"
Trey (to mom): "Well, it was just an expression."
Mom: "It's just a WHAT?"
Trey: "You should consider it a compliment!"
I have never been a big fan of baseball. I don't know much about the Rockies and I haven't been caught up in the local baseball mania. It's not a popular opinion around here, but I'm not too excited that the Rockies have made it to the World Series, especially since one of the World Series games is the day of our wedding. We have already lost two of our guests to the World Series game that happens here in Colorado on that same Saturday. So, Nathan and I are trying to figure out how we can keep people informed about the game Saturday during the reception. I have to admit, it's not really what I want to be worrying about right now!
As Nathan and I get together a list of songs to play at the reception, we are interested in the songs that are special to our friends and family. We have many songs picked out already but we would like to get an idea of what people enjoy hearing at these kinds of events. If you and your significant other have a song that is "yours," we would like to know about it. Or if there are just songs that you are fond of hearing (and dancing to) please let us know! We just might play it at our reception.
Here are some pictures from the Beth-El Church shower. It it typical for the church to throw a couples shower when somebody is getting married and they did such a nice job for us! The evening started with delicious Mennonite potluck food...
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Then the shower moved in a different direction and Nathan and I were made to play The Newlywed Game. Nathan and I, his parents, and (in the absence of my own parents) Nathan's aunt and uncle were made to come to the front of the room. While our significant others were banished to another room, we had to answer a series of questions about our relationships. The object of the game was to have our answers match the answers of our significant others. It was a pretty funny game, especially when I had to admit in front of the seventy- and eighty-year-old Mennonite quilters that Nathan and I kissed before we ever had our first date! Dan and Sue won by a landslide- which only makes sense since they have been married the longest. Nathan and I did not do very well. We only matched two out of our eight questions. One of those questions was: What could Marika do that would make Nathan happier than anything else? The answer: Leave him alone so he can play his guitar and listen to rock 'n' roll music. So romantic.
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After the excitement of the Newlywed Game, we opened presents in front of the crowd- a time-honored tradition that Nathan just does not understand. :)
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And THEN the party ended with a bang...
I love watching awards shows on tv- especially the big ones like the Academy Awards. At those kinds of events, there are people hired just to be seat holders. I guess their job is just to sit in the seats while people go to the rest room. Not that I think our wedding is ANYTHING like the Academy Awards, but at our big event we are going to need baby holders, not seat holders! Many of my closest friends who are participating in the wedding have a little one that will be with them. At the time of their participation, they will briefly need to hand off their baby to another person. It is a funny scenario!
MARIKA sees the world in pink and brown.
NATHAN sees the world in pink and brown.
Today is Nathan's birthday! He is 28 years old today. I always like it when Nathan's birthday comes around because it means that, until May, he is only three years younger than I am! :) 
This is Nathan's birthday present- the little one. I got him a travel guitar so that he will be able to play while we are on our honeymoon. He hates hauling his guitar on the plane and he won't check it in as baggage when he travels. This little one will be easier to get onto the plane. 
Here is a picture of Nathan and me on his birthday last year and then one from his birthday today. We look so much older and wiser (or maybe just more exhausted)!
Today is the day the response cards were due. There was just one in the mailbox today (good timing, Anne)! Most people have responded already but there are quite a few who have not. So, the question is... how long do you wait before calling and e-mailing and generally become a real pain about it? So far there are 222 people attending, including babies. Here are some of the more interesting responses we've received:
-Mr. and Mrs. Emily Shirk Birky will attend "fo sho"!
-Mrs. Annie Hritz and Sam Humpbert kindly returned their response card on time but did not indicate if they will or will not attend!
-Mr. Peter Epp and Ms. Shanda Hochstetler ("sadly") will not attend "and will spend the whole weekend pissing and moaning about it."
-Ms. Elizabeth Weidner and Nathan Abrahams will attend because, "H*#! Yeah.:)" They are "looking forward to the PARTY!"
-Mr. and Mrs. Richard Mosley will attend. (Who?!)
-Phil and Shera Schloesser will have 2 adults and ("hopefully") one child attending. Their baby is due October 22. I hope to meet him at the wedding 5 days later!
-Mr. and Mrs. Dan and Rhonda Wray have 3 adults coming and 3 "cuddies." They crossed out the word children both times on the response card and wrote "cuddies" instead- Nathan's fun word for children.
-Jim and Shannon Frederick will not attend and they were "sorry for the mangled card- handiwork of our new dog (he loves vellum!)"
And... ironically enough we have invited two couples named Leah and Joe.
1. Buy one more brown tie that perfectly matches the two we already bought at Dillards.
2. Get suits ordered for groomsmen.
3. Centerpiece fabric sent to mom (although at this point I should probably just wait and hope she can do her magic when she gets here!)
4. Buy brown and pink ribbons for everything.
5. Figure out how to get bridesmaid's hair done.
6. Start burning over a hundred CDs.
7. Buy cameras for the kuddies to take pictures with.
8. Make some final payments.
9. Make some kind of plan for the rehearsal dinner.
10. Get gifts for people participating and helping out with the wedding.
11. Make a list of people to have at the rehearsal dinner.
12. Buy floating candles for the centerpieces.
13. Buy silk petals for the centerpieces.
14. Call Wendy (the wedding coordinator) about rehearsal and reception responsibilities.
15. Write out an order of events for the reception.
16. Write a list of the "must take" pictures for the photographer.
17. Prepare the guest book.
18. Find a new hairstyle for the wedding.
19. Buy more brown fabric.
20. Make the slideshow for the reception.
21. Write the playlist for the reception.
22. Find somebody who can check on the centerpieces before the reception begins.
23. Confirm that Bev will set up centerpieces prior to the wedding.
24. Find an alternative to throwing rice.
25. Communicate to Bev the number of people for the head table.
26. Pick up rings from the jewelry store.
27. Go through the order of the ceremony with Merv.
28. Make arrangements for Chloey's care during the honeymoon.
29. Write directions from Beth-El to Academy Hotel.
30. Find cameras to take pictures as guests arrive.
31. Write the program for the ceremony.
32. Make arrangements for a place for Nathan to stay the night before the wedding.
33. Write our vows.
34. Figure out transportation from the church to the reception for Nathan and me.
35. Buy/get candles for the sanctuary for during the ceremony.
36. Confirm sound tech for the wedding.
37. Meet with Ryan (DJ) about duties.
38. Get marriage license.
39. Send thank you cards.
40. Decide on a reader for the wedding.
41. Find somebody to say the prayer before the dinner.
42. Find somebody to videotape the ceremony with our video camera.
43. Decide on background music while we eat at the reception.
44. E-mail Terry with poem, word search, and questions for kuddie activity book.
I'm sure this is not very interesting for you, but it helps me to feel accountable for all there is to do ASAP! :)
...is gone! Last night Nathan and I were at the church for pre-marital counseling and I had a church mailbox. I know I did because I checked it for response cards. Tonight Nathan and I were at church for an EMU alumni event and my mailbox was missing! I know it is because I looked for it to check for response cards. And somebody tampered with Nathan's mailbox too. Instead of 'Gillis, Nathan' now it says 'Gillis, Nathan & Marika'. :)
I have been dying to write about my Denver shower and so I am just going to, even though I don't have any really good pictures to share yet (except the picture of the cake).
I feel like I am getting spoiled by all the showers I have been getting. This one included my girlfriends from Denver that I have breakfast with every month. Some of them I have been close to since my EMU days! Nathan also has family near Denver. Three aunts and three grown female cousins, most of whom were able to attend! Finally, Nathan's sister Lauren drove in all the way from Kansas, and our friend Emily (Jay's wife) also came.
Becca did a beautiful job of preparing for the shower and Tammy was generous enough to host it in her beautiful home. Ramona provided the cake and Jessica helped with the food. There were many kinds of tea served with cucumber sandwiches, fruit, and other yummy foods. And, of course, the chocolate cake which had a picture of Nathan and me on it! We played some fun games and then opened some lovely presents.
At this shower I did get a very creative and thoughtful gift that I thought was such a terrific idea! Nathan's cousin Emily created a box that contained small calendars of each month. On each calendar were the dates of every family member's birthday and anniversary. It included these important days for Nathan's dad's family, his mom's family and my family as well. You can file cards behind each month so they are ready to send when the important event arrives. Behind the month of October, there was a card that Emily had made for our first anniversary! It was such a beautiful and thoughtful gift, especially since I love acknowledging birthdays and other important dates/events! There was obviously a lot of time and energy put into the gift. Here are some pictures of it:
A wedding is such a personal investment for so many people other than the bride and the groom. There are friends and family involved, each who might have their own opinions and desires for how the wedding should look and expectations about how it will play out.
I am 31 years old and the friends who know me well understand how long I have hoped and prayed to find somebody like Nathan to share my life with. And I couldn't have found anybody better. This is the wedding I have waited for.
So, what are the bride and groom to do when their wishes are so greatly different than those of important friends and family who are involved? How much do they succumb to the wishes of others? How strong should they hold to their own desires when they are in direct conflict with what other people expect? What happens when feelings are hurt and relationships change?
